Men are from Mars. Women are from Venus

Wouldn't it be easier to develop a long term, intimate and mutually fulfilling relationship with a guy, if he was a Labrador Retriever?



Why is it so hard with human guys?



Okay. Analysing time.



Let's say a guy named, Sirius asked a girl named, Nicole out to a movie. She accepts and they both have the time of their lives.


A few nights later, he asks her out to dinner, and again they both have a pretty good time. They continue to see each other regularly and soon, neither is seeing anybody else.


Then, one evening when they're driving home, a thought crosses Nicole's mind. And she says, "Do you realise that we have been seeing each other for six months already?"


Silence fills the car. To Nicole, the silence is too loud to take. She thinking, "Gee, it must have bothered him that I said that. Maybe he feels confined by this relationship. Or maybe he thinks I'm pushing him into some kind of obligation."


Sirius is thinking, "Gosh. Six months." And Nicole is thinking, "Hey, I'm not sure if I want this relationship either. Where am I heading to? Towards marriage? Children?"


And Sirius is thinking, "Six months... That means, let see... October, last year, when we started going out, which was right after I had the car at the dealer's, which means... Let me check the odometer.. Whoa. Damn it. I'm wayyy overdue for an oil change here."


And Nicole is thinking, "He's upset. I know it. I can see it on his face. Maybe, he wants more from our relationship. Yes, that must be it."


Sirius is thinking, "What the-? I'm going to get them to look at the transmission again. I don't give a damn what those assholes are doing to say. These damn thing is just not shifting right. I paid those morons so much and this thing is moving like a garbage truck.


Nicole is thinking, "He's angry. I don't blame him for that. I'd be angry too. I'm just not giving him enough in this relationship. I'm so stupid."


And Sirius is thinking, "I know what are they going to say. They are probably going to say that it's only a three month warranty!"


Nicole is thinking, "I'm too stupid, just to stupid." Sirius is thinking, "Warranty?? I'll give them a warranty!"


"Sirius." Nicole says aloud.


"What?" says Sirius.


"I know you think I'm a fool, don't you?" Nicole says.


"No!" Sirius immediately replies, glad to know the right answer.


"Sirius, do you feel the same way about time?"


"Yes." He hesitates then answers, not knowing what she even meant.


Then, Sirius takes her home, and she lies on her bed, a conflicted soul weeping till dawn. Sirius, on the other hand, reaches home, tears open a packet of chips, turns on the television and immediately becomes deeply involved in a tennis match between two Czech players he never heard of.


The next day, Nicole will call her friend and both the girls will talk for six straight hours. In painstaking detail, they will analyse everything he said and she said. They will continue discussing about this subject for weeks not coming to a definite answer.



So, you see, this is not about different wavelengths here. It's like different planets from completely different solar systems.


Guys have a guy brain, an organ that can only solve problems. It's not comfortable with nebulous concepts like love, need and trust.


But what we women think, is that, how can a guy see a girl day after day, night after night, and not be thinking about the relationship they're having?


A guy in a relationship is like an ant standing on the top of a truck tyre. The ant is aware that something large is there, but cannot even dimly comprehend what it is all about. And if the truck starts moving and the tyre starts to roll, the ant will sense something important is happening but right up until he rolls to the bottom and is squashed, the only thought in his tiny brain will be HUH?



If Nicole continues to keep quiet about the relationship, so will Sirius because he has a guy's brain. She has to keep reminding him that there is a relationship and that he is committed to it.


If not, there it goes.


Even so, how much Nicole reminds Sirius and even if it penetrates his tiny brain some day, all he can do about it is tell his guy friends,






"Nicole and I, we have, ahhhh....... ummm.. we.. we have... this thing."