Meet the muttons.

I don't know if any of you guys listen to the radio. Much less 98.7 since it's a Singapore radio station. And there's this show from 8 pm to 12 pm called the Muttons at Midnight which is so so so hilarious.



Okay. Here's the thing. There are two guys, Justin and Vernon, known as the muttons, who are like the funniest people, trust me, they are. And there's this segment on the show called the 'Roast Muttons.' The thing about this segment is people call up the muttons and exchange insults with them. The person who runs out of insults loses and if you win, you get a phone. A very canggih phone, at that.



Cool huh. You insult people and you win a phone. It might sound dumb to you but it's really really funny.



"You're so ugly that when your mum gave birth to you, they called the X-files and CSI crew to arrest you."

"You're so fat that your mum is still giving birth to you."

"You're so fat that when you leave the beach they shouted 'THE COAST IS CLEAR!'"

"You're so stupid you're a kindergarten dropout."

"Justin’s so fat, when he told me his weight, I thought it was the phone number".

"You're so flat, an aeroplane landed on your chest."

"You're so fat that when I swerved to avoid you on the road, I ran out of petrol."



So there. Funny right? Right? It's so catchy, you start playing with everyone else around you. Even my mum was laughing hysterically to all their jokes. And come on, if my mum laughed along, these guys are surely something.



Ooooh. And Vernon can tell really awesome jokes. Here's one.


There are three guys at the toilet. First guy went into the cubicle, and when he came out, he washed his hands and used lots of toilet paper.

Then he looked at the other two guys and said, "I've been taught to be thorough."

Second guy went into the cubicle, came out, washed his hands and used one tiny piece of toilet paper.

He looked at the other two and said, "I've been taught to be environmental-friendly."

Third guy went into the cubicle, and when he came out, he didn't wash his hands, or use the toilet paper.

He then, smirked at the other two guys and said, "I've been taught not to piss on my hands."



Hahahahahahaha.

*hysterically laughing with teary eyes*



Sigh.


The muttons better pay me for this.

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p/s- The results are out on the 17th, which is like day after tomorrow. Damn. It's scarier when you put it like that. And so, this morning my personal message on msn was 17171717171717171717. And Edwin was like, is that your age? wtf man wtf.